This blog was created for the millions of women and their partners overcoming, or who have overcome, the devastating loss of a pregnancy or multiple pregnancies. Sadly we are part of this not- so- cool club, and after experiencing over 20 losses between the two of us, you can kind of say we have been there and done that. We have heard the insensitive comments from doctors and friends, we have answered some of THE stupidest questions (more on that later) and we have seen how those closest to us completely disappoint in the area of empathy. We have read books by prominent doctors and healers disregard pregnancy loss as a minor event, something to ignore and quickly forget. It is because of these experiences that we have a pretty good idea of what we want for this blog and a whole hell of a lot we don't want it to be.
We will not dictate which tests to get done and which doctor to see. We will not bombard you with a series of questions such as: "Did you get genetic testing done?", "Did you see Dr. XYZ?” "Is there something wrong with you or your husband"? (That one is our personal favorite), "So and so has a friend of a friend who can't have a baby, you guys should talk!" No. We are not about whipping you into a frenzied state of anxiety, while subtly insinuating there is something "wrong" with you and/or your partner. Our motivation is to dole out hope and healing, because we have been there many, many... many times. And if there is one thing we know, it's that what is needed is comfort. Our goal is to help you find the gold in your life (no matter how dark it seems) and the knowledge that the one thing you can control during this incredibly screwed up time is how you treat your emotional and physical self. Of course, a little bit of self- deprecating humor never hurt anyone.
We invite comments of all kinds (sort of, be nice people!). Hopefully between all of us we can shut down one of the last taboos in women's health and take ownership of our own health and healing without apology.